Being a Father to an Infant

Lying in bed and immediately knowing the hard object that’s poking you in the butt is a toy.

Understanding the reason for your (stay-at-home) partner’s fatigue even though it may seem staying at home is a holiday.


Watching (with equal amounts of pleasure and worry) a little human chew food.

Discovering your honed reflexes is useful for something besides catching food before it hits the ground.

Building your upper body muscles without going to the gym. Babies aren’t featherlight.

Never eating a meal alone as long as Baby’s awake.

Speaking in tongues. Babyese.

Perfecting the acrobatics and finesse needed to use a smartphone or game console pad while holding Baby.

Praising every attempt and accomplishment – clapping hands, first steps, first words, ‘no tears-poo’.

Excuding immeasurable happiness whenever Baby falls asleep. And stays asleep all night.

Fatherhood Moments of Bliss

When Zoë…

(in no particular order, but I’ll leave the best for last)

  • falls asleep in my arms.
  • wakes up in the middle of the night, sits up in bed and talks to herself till she sleeps off. Well I do hope she IS talking to HERSELF.
  • doesn’t cry during bath time even when water flows down on her face.
  • stinks up the room but there’s nothing in her nappy, only memories of a fart.
  • gives me a panda-hug just because.19559-Panda-Hug
  • sleeps throughout a flight.
  • sleeps throughout a wedding ceremony.
  • sleeps while I’m trying to kill a boss on Xbox (you catch my drift regarding sleep).
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  • shows interest in books.
  • dances and sings on beat to the music in her head.
  • entertains herself in her playpen as long mommy/daddy smile at her once in a while. File_000.jpeg
  • shares lunch with me and we don’t even make a mess.
  • lets us dress her up without breaking a sweat.
  • gets tired of throwing her toys on the floor just to see how fast I can pick them up.
  • gives me a big wide smile when she sees me in the morning or when I get back from work.File_000 (1)
  • wakes up in the morning and goes to bed at night healthy, happy, and hearty.

Sunny Beach

Traveling with a baby is an adventure that cannot be fully understood nor imagined until you experience it. Although thousands of blogs and articles may provide you with advice, tips, and strategies, all your plans and the success of the trip are chiefly determined by the wellbeing of your child/ren.

A holiday with a baby is just as similar as traveling with a small child as it is different. Obviously the main factor is that your offspring is dependent on you 100% of the time. Even when your baby is sleeping, you need to be observant, present, watchful, careful, everything-ful. It’s quite common to hear parents say they need a holiday to rest after their holiday with a baby.

We’ve just returned from a seaside holiday with Zoë. This being our 3rd Wedlejt-Ogunleye international trip  (Cities visited as a family: Wroclaw, Bologna, Florence, Venice, Paris, Krakow, Sunny Beach, & Nessebar) it’s safe to say we are now experts at this thing.

That being said, Bulgaria is a great place to spend your holiday if you’ve got kids, and you’ve got a budget. There was no crowd in early July (lots of space on the beach), the water is quite clear and warm (although there were a few jellyfish), and there was a variety of eateries at affordable prices (in comparison with Warsaw standards). We stayed in Hotel Lion at Sunny Beach: a nice 3-star hotel with 2 pools (unheated) and “OK” meals. I’d recommend it to anyone who doesn’t need to be right next to the beach (wouldn’t have minded that) nor right in the middle of the party zone (thank God).

Tips for your summer holiday

  • Always research your holiday and destination options before you make your choice. Regardless of how the tourist agency markets the package, look for info from various sources and make sure it suits YOUR needs.
  •  When travelling with a baby, leave as many things as possible in your checked baggage. The less time you spend showing your the cosmetics and electronics in your hand luggage to airport security, the time (and hands) you’ve got to keep your baby calm.
  • Ensure your baby stroller is as light and portable as possible.
  • Buy a baby pool and a baby beach tent (YCTML).
  • Always prepare a bottle of formula/baby food/water/juice for your baby before you leave for the airport (every time your child finishes a bottle, prepare another. Babies don’t understand the word “WAIT!”)
  • Don’t panic when the baby starts crying at the airport or on the plane. People be bitches and they’ll give you the side eye. One foolish ugly pimple-ridden girl even asked the flight attendant if she could do something about the crying baby. Just do your best to calm the baby and survive the ordeal. Remember they can’t throw you off the plane for having a crying baby.
  • Last but not least, #1 PLAN AND PREPARE…but #2 BE FLEXIBLE AND READY FOR ANYTHING!
  • Have fun ^_^

A Globetoddler Globetrotting

Next week Wanda and I went are going on our 2nd international trip with Zoë – Easter in Paris. Yaay!

Weather forecast predicts a bit of snow in Warsaw over the holidays…while it will be 8 degrees warmer in the City of Lights. I’ll take that as a sign of forthcoming blessings ^_^

Quite a few travel blogs have confirmed that the Paris métro and Venice bridges have one thing in common – they’re mostly NOT baby-friendly. Which means there’ll be a lot of heavy-lifting done while trudging up and down numerous steps.

An ideal scenario with a baby that’s practically getting bigger daily.

Fortunately, the alternative in Paris, i.e. travelling by bus, is much cheaper than the gondola.

Come what may, we’re looking forward to a hassle-free trip. IMG_20160317_001334IMG_20160315_202328

Love Don’t Care

Click to listen >> Love Don’t Care

simildc

 

My amazingly talented sister has released a new single.

Perfectly timed for Valentine’s weekend, this song will make you hug that special someone for a few minutes longer than usual 😛

Beautiful music from a beautiful soul with a beautiful voice.

#dropmic

Daddy Duties

  • Baby baths (#notears shampoo? Liars.)
  • Diaper changes (2.5kg* of poo in one week)
  • Nursery rhymes and lullabies (Stinky Winky Bąky Star)
  • Feeding and burping (the Chinese would be pleased)
  • Fashion styling (future Top Model)
  • Dozens of pictures and videos captured and saved in Clouds
  • Baby ID and Baby Savings Account, because #ModernFamily and #WinterIsComing

These were some of our adventures in the first couple of weeks of Zoë’s life. It’s not been easy on Wanda playing the role of mother, wife, and housewife all at once…but someone’s got to do it 😛

Fortunately, the Ideal Woman found me; I’d like to pen in an offhanded thank you to the trials and tribulations I dated between 2004 and 2014 – 10 years of roaming the wilderness, and I ain’t even Jewish.

Being a parent is just as complicated and magical as I’d always imagined. In addition, Zizou had a double medical checkup today, and all the results were positive.

My daughter is healthy and my wife loves me.

Dreams do come true.

Instagram – @Zoe.Temilola or @FakeAjebutter

too late for goodbyes and apologies

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At a bazaar in the old town
He once bought an umbrella
from an aged lady
in a dress of many colours

Memories
race back on bullet trains
through hollow spaces
in aching hearts

One Monday evening
his father Stalked out the door
into the rain
with a Juicy Bone of Contention

Regret
comes easy as time passes
In the future, apologies
are like Cheap Bracelets

Another rainy monday
His Umbrella long abandoned
in an unnamed ditch
After all, cars Kill fathers too.

The Night My Father Died (edited)

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It doesn’t matter who my father was; it matters who I remember he was.

– Anne Sexton

 

I feel so sorry about Dad. I haven’t seen him for almost my whole life, but I love him so much.
My mom and granny have been terribly sad since they heard the news. They remember him as the most wonderful person. I feel so sorry that I had no opportunity to grow up with him, and I’m so upset that I can’t come to Nigeria to see him off.

– Tina Charles Ogunleye

 

I cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father’s protection.

– Sigmund Freud

 

When we were kids, our Dad spoilt us. He was always able to provide us with some of our wants and all of our needs. In the early years he used to work in Warri and only spent weekends in Lagos, so we always looked forward to Fridays with ripe anticipation. One of my oldest memories is most probably the story behind my sweet tooth. Back then every time Daddy came to Lagos, he came with gifts of Scottish shortbread. It is still my favourite biscuit.

We have always been a family of film fanatics and book readers. On most weekends Daddy would drive us down to one of the shopping plazas to pick up a couple of films from the video club. Being a gang of stubborn kids, Daddy would save himself the time wasted and stress caused by arguments over which films we could take, and he would let each of us take whichever films suited our personal taste. This was also a way to keep Simisola from being bullied. Last borns always have it tough. We often ended up taking home close to 10 films.

Whenever I asked my Dad for cash to buy a new book or comic, he would give me enough to buy 2 or 3. Those roads to a million worlds and windows to a billion lives were revealed to me at a very young age, and I still sneak away as often as possible from reality hiding away in a book.

 

Proverbs 13:1

New International Version – UK (NIVUK)

13 – A wise son heeds his father’s instruction,

   but a mocker does not respond to rebukes.

 

Charlie wasn’t very religious when we were kids. Compared to Mummy, he was more of a “when will the pastor stop talking” kind of church-goer. But he was a good man with a good heart. And he did lay the foundations for strong, good characters in his children. Our Dad drummed the ills of smoking and taking drugs into our heads as soon as it was obvious we knew Marlborough wasn’t the name of superhero. It’s probably thanks to him that I have always seen cigarettes as a dirty, disgusting and “lower class” habit. Charlie never smoked and he rarely drank, although those bottles of cognacs, wines and whisky he brought back from his trips abroad are the reason for my good taste. Don’t tell my Mum, but I do my love my Merlot. A glass a day keeps the doctor away.

I remember a beach party I attended in my teen years in Lagos where I had a little too much palm-wine to drink. When Daddy came to pick me up, he helped me into the car…and all the way to my bed. How many Dads do that these days?

My Dad taught me to always make sure I am my own best friend. He said “people come and people go…it’s dangerous to place your trust in anyone because people usually only think of themselves; he advised me to be careful who I call friend. As a teenager, I noticed he had stopped taking his own advice to heart – a discovery which saddened me. These last few years I’ve been asking myself if I shouldn’t have done a lot more in order to to set my parents back on “the right path”.

Daddy always told me I could achieve any and all of my dreams, as long as I was ready to work hard to reach my goals. He always emphasized the importance of education. Knowing he went all the way to Russia to study Chemical Engineering was always an inspiration for me. As a child, I used to think everyone in Nigeria had Charlie to thank for having petrol in their cars and gas or kerosene in their kitchens.

Tina and I are deeply saddened that we can’t be there with you right now, our family and friends, to share all these memories of Daddy, Charles Oladele Ogunleye. We regret not having spent more time with him. We regret the distance that appeared between us as the years went by. We regret that someone who meant a lot to so many people had to slip away in such a manner.

The good memories, the good stories are what we’ll fill that empty place in our hearts with. Charlie, missing you already…

 

1 Kings 2:1-4

New International Version – UK (NIVUK)

David’s charge to Solomon

1 When the time drew near for David to die, he gave a charge to Solomon his son.

2 ‘I am about to go the way of all the earth,’ he said. ‘So be strong, act like a man, 3 and observe what the Lord your God requires: walk in obedience to him, and keep his decrees and commands, his laws and regulations, as written in the Law of Moses. Do this so that you may prosper in all you do and wherever you go 4 and that the Lord may keep his promise to me: “If your descendants watch how they live, and if they walk faithfully before me with all their heart and soul, you will never fail to have a successor on the throne of Israel.”

– Olatokunbo Oluwatosin Omo-Ogunleye